God’s promise was to never leave or forsake me. However, the absence of my short-term memory has left me dependent on others for daily living.
Often, I stare in the mirror, not recognizing the person staring back. I ask myself, “Who is this decrepit person?”
While looking in the mirror, I place my wrinkly hands on my face. My fingers pulsate with pain from arthritis with each movement.
My wobbly legs prevent me from standing for long periods. I cautiously descend to my wheelchair to prevent falling.
While ambulating with my wheelchair across the other side of the room, my body experiences uncontrollable tremors.
I grow frustrated and depressed thinking about my physical and cognitive infirmities.
I feel guilty and ashamed of having someone care for me.
If only I could dress and feed myself. If only I could prepare my own meals. If only I had my short-term memory. If only I were continent. If only I would not repetitively ask my caregiver the same questions.
While gazing out of the living room window, a ray of radiant sunshine compliments a beautiful blue sky.
I see several hummingbirds hovering near a large Oak tree with their beaks devouring nectar from the feeder.
I see a young woman pushing her infant in a stroller on the sidewalk, as others congregate to take a peek.
I see a beautiful Blue Jay, flying near a Maple tree, while sparrows perch on various tree limbs.
Despite my infirmities, I’m thankful for God’s goodness, and the beauty I see.
God’s been so merciful, for I could have been dead and gone.
As I reminisce of yesteryear, I’m thankful to God who brought me from a mighty long way.
Throughout my relationship with God, I’ve always been an avid reader of His Word.
While thumbing through various Books of the Bible, I turn to Isaiah 46:4.
“Even to your old age and gray hairs, I am He, I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.”
While meditating on this passage, I realize its simplicity, truth, and relevance.
I realize that I don’t have to go through the aging process alone.
Despite whatever issues I’m going through, I know God will never leave or forsake me.
I also reminisce of Psalm 139, of God creating and knowing everything about me.
I’m comforted in knowing I’m in the Master’s Hands.
I’m no longer afraid of life, or death.
Glory be to the God of all comfort.
Edward L. Wright © 2019